Rules for Proper Funeral Etiquette

Funerals are a bittersweet time that mourns the loss of a loved one and celebrate their lives all at once. Proper funeral etiquettes have evolved over time and our natural instinct often kicks in to guide our behaviours during the service. Listed below are a few of the do’s and don’ts of funeral etiquettes.


We often fall short of words to express our compassion towards someone who has lost a loved one. However, poems and stories aren’t always necessary because those who are mourning are mostly unable to hold long conversations. Simple words, such as “I am sorry for your loss and I pray for you and your family” are enough. If you are unable to attend the funeral service, sending a card with flowers is a nice gesture.


Funerals are increasingly being attempted to portray as the celebration of life, thus, you are accepted to dress in darker colours. Although we should avoid extremely casual and flashy outfits, wearing outfits that we would commonly wear to interviews and weddings is becoming more acceptable.

Register Book

The family of the lost one usually keeps a register book to gather notes from the attendees as memories to look back on as the years pass by. Make sure to write down your full name, relationship to the deceased along with a note offering your condolences or your favourite memory of the deceased.


It’s the thought that counts in regards to gifts so you don’t have to go too overboard. Suitable presents may include a donation to the charity of the family’s choice, flowers or commitment of service to the family. Services to the family can include cooking them dinner, cleaning up their home or any tasks that may get avoided during the mourning period of the family. Always make sure to include a card so the family knows who the present is from.

Stay in Touch

A family needs time and space to grieve, however, a simple note or phone call after the funeral lets them know you care. You may also leave a note on social media. A family needs all the support they can get from people around them following a loss of a loved one.


Kids are usually aware of death and should be allowed to attend if they lost someone who was close to them, such as an aunt, uncle or grandparent. However, it will not be appropriate to have children around if they will cause a commotion and disturb the service. If the latter is the case, it will be more respectful to leave them at home with a babysitter.

Good Times

Losing a loved one causes deep pain and grief, however, remembering all the good times help make the healing process smooth. Sharing a funny and appropriate story with the family of the deceased or during your speech may be exactly what the attendees need to hear.

Contact Amherst Funeral and Cremation Services!

Respect and care towards the deceased and grieving family are of our utmost importance. Amherst Funeral Services and Cremation Services offer simple, affordable, and dignified funeral services. Our motive is to provide residents of Vancouver with simple, easy-to-understand, and comprehensive packages at affordable prices, no hidden fee, no hassle, and most importantly, no sales pressure.

Visit to view all our services. Please call us at 604.800.0468 for any information you need.